Tag Archives: dating

Well… Good News! …and a Rant

Been a little while since my last entry.  Gotta keep up with my writing, so I’m brewing some Earl Grey next to me while I write.

The most exciting news since my last entry is that Kelsie and I went on a date last weekend and we’re going out again this next weekend!  With all my concern and frustration, it all worked itself out.

All of our friends have taken turns saying things like, “Finally!” and “We’ve been rooting for you two to get together since October!”  To which we just shake our heads.  I don’t know why I waited so long exactly.  It just felt right to take my time.  Then when I asked her out and she said yes, it also felt right.  This relationship, though taxing on me when I was debating with myself on whether or not to ask her out, has just felt right every step of the way.

Neither one of us is into the cliche of a normal first date, so we didn’t go to dinner and a movie.  Instead drove out northwest of town until we found an open trail (there’s still snow on many of the mountain roads nearby).  Then we ended hiking a total of 11 miles.  By the time we got back to town, it was mid afternoon.

Later that evening, Kelsie’s roommate wanted her and me to go with her to “The Vagina Monologues.”  I wasn’t really interested, but Kelsie wanted to go out of curiosity.  So we went.

If you don’t know what the Vagina Monologues are about, the name is actually very descriptive.  Women of many different walks of life were interviewed about their vaginas and their stories are retold by actors.  Some of the stories are pretty good, some are terrible, and a few are simply hard to take (there is one about a rape victim).

The fact that this exists only further proves to me that our culture is so vastly oversexualized that a woman is supposed to take pride in her vagina like it is her.  What if that were put toward men?  That men should take pride in their penises?

People are not their sexual organs.  People are people.  Sex is a part of life.  Yes, a very important part, but just a part.  America is disappointingly oversexualized.

/rant/ I’m not a prude, I don’t think sex is a taboo topic or something inappropriate and to be discussed only in private.  Just because I prefer to be abstinent until marriage doesn’t make me antisexual.  I choose to be abstinent because I simply don’t think it’s a very good idea for me to sleep with anyone except who my wife is.  It’s just my personal choice, I encourage everyone to do what they think it right, and if that means it’s okay to have sex outside of marriage, I’m not going to judge.  People will judge me for my choice, since it’s so rare among my generation, but I don’t care.  If I don’t want to judge, then I must first not judge others. /endrant/

Thanks for staying with me there, I just needed to get that off my chest.  A coworker was pestering me about that a day or two ago.

I’d rather end this entry on a high note, so I want to wish everyone a happy Thursday.  Just hang in there, it’s almost Friday, all!




Two entries in one day!?  Absurd!  And yet, here I sit at my desk typing away at an entry not even an hour after my last.

I just finished reading two blog entries that really seemed to speak to my internal struggle with my relationship with Kelsie in a way that I’d never really thought of before.  One really seemed to describe Kelsie perfectly so I subscribed (I’ll link at the end of this entry).

Growing up as an Army Brat I was no stranger to having a life never truly settled.  However, my mother always craved a calm, stable life.  So when my father retired from the Army, we settled in a small town in southern Arizona.  We lived there for almost half my life, I began to develop the same feelings toward how I want my life to turn out that my mom did.

One of the biggest internal struggles of mine is to find a role model that I can emulate.  My mom and I have a lot in common, however, this is not one of those common traits.  I developed a “Let’s settle down and start a family” from her.  I don’t really want that deep down.  That’s why Kelsie’s restless spirit is so attractive to me.  I need to stop emulating my mom in this way, it’s not leading me to fulfillment or a life that I actually dream about.

I know that not wanting a stable life is absurd.  It’s dangerous.  It’s stupid.  It’s…exciting.  That’s what I want.  I want the life that takes me down roads less traveled and leads me toward a life that gives me stories to tell.

I ask myself where I will be in ten years… Who knows?  I don’t want to be settled down prematurely.  I don’t want to be a slave to a daily grind that drains me of my drive to live a life worth living.  I don’t want the same “American Dream” life that my mother wants.  So I need to stop pretending I do.

So here’s the link to the blog entry that I read.  Aleah seems to be spot-on in this blog entry.  I subbed, and if anyone reading this likes the entry too, I definitely recommend subbing too.

Never forget who you are.